Asteroid to be Named After Trayvon Martin?

An asteroid will be named after Trayvon Martin, if William Lowell Putnam, III, has his way.

Mr. Putnam is the trustee of the Lowell Observatory in Flagstaff, Arizona, where, 13 years ago, the asteroid was discovered and named 2000 TM61.

It was when Florida thug Trayvon Martin was shot in self-defense in 2012 that Mr. Putnam submitted the name-change nomination to the Minor Planet Center, which decided that the naming was “premature” (but clearly the real reason was that they were racist).

But when Trayvon’s shooter, George Zimmerman, was acquitted almost a year and a half later, Mr. Putnam decided it was time yet again to suggest renaming the asteroid after Trayvon.

At first this might seem silly, as if Mr. Putnam’s efforts to create what he calls “social fairness” would be better directed at something else. But upon deeper consideration, the notion of naming an asteroid after Trayvon Martin becomes absolutely frightening.

Think about it. Zimmerman, Trayvon’s shooter, was watching Trayvon as he skulked in the shadows of a wealthy, gated community that had been experiencing robberies by black youths. Lowell Observatory, similar to Zimmerman, has been and will continue to keep tabs on Asteroid Trayvon, watching it as Zimmerman watched Trayvon.

Zimmerman soon gave up looking for Trayvon and returned to his car, at which point a wild Trayvon pounced from the bushes and proceeded in the act of killing Zimmerman (he failed before he could finish, thankfully).

So what’s going to happen if ever Lowell Observatory stops watching Asteroid Trayvon? Asteroid Trayvon is going to attack Earth and attempt to kill us all. Then Earth will shoot Asteroid Trayvon out of the sky, saving the planet but destroying Asteroid Trayvon, and then the Milky Way Justice System will envelope Earth in a force field for 16 months until they put Earth on trial.

Upon Earth’s acquittal, all the aliens from all the other planets will hurl other asteroids at Earth in a blind rage, much like the looting and destruction of private property that occurred upon Zimmerman’s acquittal by people who “looked like Trayvon.”

So it’s not just because I don’t like Trayvon as a person that I oppose the naming of an asteroid after him, but for the safety of the planet.

If Putnam’s criteria for naming an asteroid after a person is that the person must be or have been a young black kid, he should choose Temar Boggs, who, along with his friend, followed a kidnapper until the kidnapper got so nervous that he let his 5-year-old victim free.

Anybody but a criminal like Trayvon.