L.A. Mayor Chased Out of Church by Black Lives Matter

You just can’t be liberal enough to please some people.

Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti found that out the hard way on Monday, as a group of Black Lives Matter protesters started charging the podium at a public meeting, leading Garcetti to exit stage left surrounded by police officers.

In what was supposed to be a town hall meeting at Holman United Methodist Church, Garcetti had been expected to answer questions for the community about “economic opportunity and community safety,” according to NBC-LA.

In a group of several hundred people, dozens of Black Lives Matter protesters kept interrupting and chanting, “Black lives, they matter here!”

Despite pleas to hold a “civil conversation,” the interruptions kept occurring, and Garcetti resorted to trying to explain why saying “all lives matter” (they do) is racist (it isn’t).

According to The L.A. Times, Garcetti’s tweedy little monologue went like this:

“Let me say, you’re right, your analysis,” he said. “I hate this back-and-forth we hear nationally, where people say black lives matter and politicians say all lives matter. Black lives matter in a unique way, and you and I see eye to eye on this. …

“… If you just try to say all lives matter, you write people out of history. You write slavery out of history. You write oppression and violence out of history. You write racism and lynching out of history. So I get why it is important — just hear me out for one second — you’re right.”

And then people whose butts he was kissing rushed the podium and chased him out of the church.

It was rather fitting.

Black Lives Matter has been having other confrontations around L.A. ever since the whole Ferguson nonsense began. In the grand tradition of hippy-dippy wannabe revolutionaries everywhere, they’ve put together a list of five demands, only two of which are truly interesting: the firing of the police chief and “reparations” for police violence.

Actually, reparations aren’t such a bad idea, so long as they come with some conditions.

First, the money really is for reparations. Once it’s paid, that’s it. There is no more, and all black activists have to stop what they’re doing and become useful members of society. All black-centric organizations, programs and privileges are out the door. No longer will being “underprivileged” qualify you to go to the front of the line or to get free stuff or special treatment that no one else gets.

Second, only people whose ancestors actually were slaves get money, and the money is taken only from people whose ancestors actually owned slaves. Since the KKK was founded by Democrats, it’s a good bet that the Left is going to have to bleed itself pretty intensely. Also, “slave” should include descendants of the thousands of European indentured servants who were brought to America. Indentured servants are usually forgotten because of their skin color and lack of a lobby group, but reparations for slavery should recognize all slaves, not just those of one skin color or ethnic origin.

Third, and most importantly, rap music is banned. All songs referencing hos, bitches, gangstas, “hunned dollah” bills and shooting at cops are erased from every electronic device ever made, and rappers and their fans pull their pants up and begin using standard spoken English.

OK, that last one is particularly gratuitous, but if Black Lives Matter mobs are willing to agree to all that, then I’ll back reparations.

Until that time, all lives matter — equally — and loud-mouthed, crime-supporting street mobs can just get used to it.