Captain America vs. the Conservatives

Captain America can fight off Nazi supervillains, alien invaders, destruction-minded evil robots and enemy agents, but even he can’t escape the mysterious meanderings and mayhem of … the liberal writer!

You have to realize the movies and comic books are separate projects. Thus far, the Captain America movies and assorted team ups have avoided overt politicization of the Captain America story line in favor of superheroic fantasy.

Not so the comic books, sadly.

In the comic books published by Marvel, Captain America has been killed, and in order that the world should not be without the First Avenger, Sam Wilson has taken up the shield and winged helmet. For those familiar only with the movies, Sam Wilson is the Falcon, as seen in “Winter Soldier” and briefly in “Avengers: Age of Ultron.”

The latest villain to face off against Cap/Falcon is a group calling itself the Sons of the Serpent. (One thing that’s consistent in Captain America tales is reptile-themed villain groups, be they Hydra, Sons of the Serpent, the Serpent Society, etc.)

The Sons of the Serpent are described as “costumed American racist super-patriots” who hate illegal immigrants — and probably peace and happiness as well. So naturally they are patrolling the U.S.-Mexico border looking for illegal immigrants. When they find them, they — gasp — arrest them.

So Cap gets wrangled into this fight by the mother of an illegal immigrant, whom the Sons have apprehended on suspicion of being a smuggler when in fact he is only delivering food and water to other illegal crossers like himself.

The leader of the Sons of the Serpent sounds a lot like Donald Trump, talking about illegal immigrants, “the mighty wall,” etc. This should be no surprise because the comic’s writer is Nick Spencer, who has made it publicly known that he despises Trump.

He also adores Hillary Clinton, so expect Cap in the near future to get some Americans killed, blame it on a video, then lie about what happened, all while sharing classified emails with Hydra.

I imagine that, after their adventures, the world’s superheroes all gather at some out-of-the-way saloon and commiserate about the random political stances they’ve been obligated to take because of some greasy-haired writer in New York.

Like the time Superman renounced his U.S. citizenship because he was tired of people thinking he represented America. (Anyone recall “truth, justice and the American way”?)

Or the time Spider-Man (or any of several other heroes) had to put up with Barack Obama hogging his pages.

Or the time Marvel’s biggest mass murderers like Dr. Doom, Magneto, Kingpin, etc. gathered to help New York recover from 9/11. Ummm. …

It’s not like it’s Cap’s first turn as a liberal tool, after all. There was that bit during the early seventies where he fought a group called the Secret Empire, whose leader, Number One (“Prisoner” reference alert), turns out to be none other than Richard Nixon.

Hey, if you’re gonna chase liberal fantasies, go big.