German Liberals Think About Banning Animal Sex

Like many Americans with military veterans in the family, I grew up hearing stories about how we kicked the snot out of the Germans in World War II.

I never realized until today that we may have kicked them just a little too hard.

Then comes the headline, “German government to reintroduce ban on bestiality.”

Reintroduce? Honestly, I think you WWII vets may have broke something.

Back in 1969, Germany not only legalized homosexuality, but bestiality as well, according to the Daily Telegraph.

(American gays go into histrionics when you compare homosexuality to bestiality, but apparently the German pervert community was OK with the connection and demanded the package deal.)

Now, the German government is considering making animal sex illegal and subject to a fine again, under pressure from animal rights groups who, oddly enough, see the cross-species fetish as animal abuse.

I’ve always known that Germans are big animal lovers, I just never realized how literally they took that concept.

In WWII, there was a secret Nazi project (is there any other kind of Nazi project?) to teach dogs to speak human language. The files on the project indicate the scientists were actually beginning to have success with a couple of animals being able to repeat understandable short phrases.

Apparently, one of those phrases was “I do.”

This does go a long way toward explaining all the young German tourists I’ve seen walking around town in leather and dog collars.

The move to ban animal love is being prompted by the appearance of “erotic zoos” on the German scene. The new law would ban “pimping” of animals.

The law change is meeting with organized resistance from Germany’s “zoophiles,” led by a group called ZETA (you don’t want to know what it stands for).

Michael Kiok, a lobbyist who — shudder — lives with his dog is afraid that if animal sex is banned, the government could take away Lassie — or at least keep her from wearing corsets in public.

“Mere morals have no place in law,” said the man who proposed to his dog.

As evil and twisted as Hitler was, I don’t think this is what he had in mind when he talked about the “master race.”

It just goes to show there’s always lower liberals can take a society.

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